Thursday, April 10, 2008

"GAWWWD, you're such a baby!"

I'm sure many of you readers think I've bitched too much about my husband during this pregnancy (and, maybe too much before pregnancy as well). But tonight I must post this for precicely these two reasons...

1) So you all know exactly what an unsympathetic prick he can act like when I'm pregnant, therefore triggering my raging blog posts


2) So I can look back on this post in the future when I think it'd be oh so grand to open up vacancy of my uterus. Maybe I should just have my uterus ripped out, or his balls hacked off.

So... what has fueled my fire tonight, you might ask?

Last night we all had a rough sleeping night in this house. I am so so uncomfortable, day and night, and I can't sleep well at all. Porter was up quite a bit and that kept me up, along with hearing Ryan snore in my ear. I finally asked him to go sleep on the couch at 4am so I could get 2 hours of sleep.

Tonight I get ready to go to bed and Ry had fallen asleep on the couch. Snoring like the world was ending. He woke up and followed me to bed. I told him he wasn't sleeping in the bedroom and he ignores me, climbs into bed and says "If I wake you up I'll go out on the couch." Well... that'd be too late because then I'd be awake and have a hard time falling BACK asleep. So I grab my pillow and take my fat ass out to the couch. In which he huffs out after me saying "What is your PROBLEM? GOD! You're such a BABY!" and then pouts his way into Hudson's room to sleep on the floor.

Yes, I'm a baby. Sure.. you try being almost 9 months pregnant, try having a human living inside YOUR body, stretching your skin, kicking your insides and ribs and squishing your lungs and bladder all night. I'm uncomfortable as hell. I can't get comfortable in bed and I wake up every 2 hours to pee about half an ounce. Once I'm up to pee I can't get comfortable seeing that I have one of two positions to lie in... left side or right side. Both of which seem to squash some nerve in my hip and back and leg while I sleep and I wake up feeling numb and it takes me 10 minutes to turn over to my "second" sleep position. On top of that I have (oh I'll leave out the mean name I just typed) my dear, sweet husband sleeping next to me snoring like his freaking throat is closing in, all the while knowing you'll have to get up- sleep deprived, and go work a full day and take care of a toddler most of the evening (Ry has classes M, Tu, Wed nights this week so I play single mom for most evenings as he still can't prioritize his time and does his homework before class).

I've analyzed why I think he snores "only" while I'm pregnant. 1) I sleep lighter when I'm pregnant (who wouldn't... being so uncomfortable) so maybe its more noticeable, but probably not the entire reason 2)When I was pregnant with Porter I gained 40lbs. So did he. I lost 40lbs. He lost about... ehhh...20. And then gained it back. So he's back up tipping XXX (I'll be nice and not name a number) and from everything I've read, gaining weight is a big factor to the start of snoring.

After he called me a baby, I laid there, on the couch, wanting to cry as he has no idea what pregnancy is like. And another part of me was so angry that had I been standing I'd probably have punched him in the face. But then again it'd have taken me 10 minutes to get off the couch to do that.

That, my friends, is why I bitch.

Thank you, and good night.


  1. Coming from a light, not-so-good sleeper, I would have taken the time to stand up & pop him one! (But I'm just such a baby like that too!)
    I hope that once the eviction, I mean the Blessed event happens, you are able to gain back a normal sleep pattern, as normal as a newborn allows & Ryans snoring disappears too!

  2. I am so with you and I'm not even 7 months pregnant yet.

    Last night the FH came to bed at 2am. He turned on the light to the bathroom, turned on the tv, asked me to move over, asked if he could watch the damn spurs game, asked why I was so bitchy and I FREAKED the hell out. I was screaming - stomping my feet - did I mention screaming at the top of my lungs about what a gigantic asshole he is and how selfish he is and how I couldn't believe I had married someone that could be so heartless to the mother of his unborn child. I went downstairs to sleep on the couch and told him to leave me the hell alone and he FOLLOWED ME which only fueled the rage.

    Note to all Men: When we are sleeping leave us the hell alone. And Leave us alone is NOT code for Come near me and talk to me and SNORE in my damn ear.

  3. I'd be super annoyed too!!!
    Quit snoring already, Ryan!!!!

  4. Sometimes snoring is a sign of a serious medical issue. My husband used to snore, and then was diagnosed with sleep apnea. He had sinus surgery and barely snores now. He also lost some weight too.

    Best of luck for the both of you!

  5. My husband also snored alot with my third pregnancy, mainly and it was due to weight...after the baby came he lost about 50 pounds and hasn't snored much since then. I can definitely sympathize, but luckily for me his butt would be off to the couch without TOO much pissing about it. I hope things improve for you with that...I know how important ANY sleep is when your pregnant, since it's hard to get it to begin with!

  6. LoL.... these comments are cracking me up too!
    My husband snores sometimes too, and, when I was pregnant I would just be kicking him in the bed.

    You just need to have that baby already:)

  7. i hope you feel better now that you got that off your chest. they have NO IDEA. i'm not even pg and my hubs drives me nuts with his blissful snoring and keeping me awake... even when i WAKE HIM UP and say YOU'RE SNORING he just goes mmmmm and goes back to it. i leave too to get a few hours of sleep...