Sunday, October 25, 2009

Hearing Help NEEDED

I don't know where to start but I do know I need advice before I lose my mind. I don't know what to do with Porter.... he's a smart kid. A sweet kid. I could go on and on about his good points but that would defeat the purpose of my HELP post.

The kid DOES NOT LISTEN for anything. Not so much that he doesn't listen... because I KNOW he listens... I KNOW he hears us. He just chooses to ignore what we say and do what he wants regardless. You might think that he has no consequences... that we let him get away with whatever he does despite what we say. No... he does get caught, he does get in trouble EVER SINGLE TIME. I don't know how to drill it into his head.

For example.... this is just recent because I can't rack my brain for the 10million other times these things happen...

Yesterday he wanted a snack of Goldfish. He brought out an unopened bag of goldfish and asked for a snack. I told him no, that I was making dinner and we'd have dinner in a minute. I also told him there was some Apple Cinnemon Cheerios on the coffee table if he was really hungry.

A few minutes later, I heard paper tearing noises in the dining room. I walked in to find him sitting at the dining room table, opening the goldfish bag. I asked him (ok, I yelled) What did I just tell you? He said "No". So I sent him to his room. I mean, what the hell else can I do? What I really wanted to do was punch him in his face (ok, maybe not that drastic but I was SO irritated!!!).

Then today he kept purposely taking this stupid toy Mater that Hudson loves. His "Tow Tuck". I told Porter to leave it alone because it is Hudson's special toy right now just like the orange dump truck is Porter's special truck right now. They both have their favorites at different times. So I tried to make it clear as to WHY it wasn't nice to take it... that it would be the same as Hudson taking his orange dump truck. A few minutes later Hudson is whining because Porter took the dump truck. I told Porter to give it back and he did, but he complained And then seriously seconds later Hudson sat it down and Porter jumped up, swooped over and snatched it off the ground. I told him to give it back and to go on up to his room because he doesn't listen.

I am at my wits end. Its like the kid does NOT CARE. I don't know what consequences to give him for not listening. Its such a weird thing... I mean, when he's rough with his trucks or does something not nice with a toy, we take the toy away for the day. If he hits or jumps on the couch he goes to time out or is banned from the couch. If he sasses off he gets sassy sauce. I just don't know what to do with listening. Take his fucking ears away? Because he obviously doesn't use them and I'm sure there are some deaf kids out there that would be happy to have them.

And then... night time. OH my fucking god. The kid... The THREE AND A HALF YEAR OLD is up numerous times a night. He wakes up and yells for us. YELLS. And of course we have to respond or else Hudson will get woken up. He wakes up crying he doesn't want to sleep in his bed. He wakes up whining for this or that or what not. NUMEROUS times a night. His blanket falls off his bed. WAAAAHHHHHH MMOOOOOOOMMMMM! Ugh. I want to put him in a kennel in the basement and just let him scream his fucking no-listening head off. And then he has fits about naps or bedtime so we put an alarm on his door. The kind that go off when the magnet is no longer together (aka... door opens). El cheapo alarm and super simple... its not like we put a code on his door. Porter is scared of the alarm so he stays in his room. But lots of times he'll make up reasons to need to come out and SCREAM about them. " I HAVE TO PEEEEE" after he's peed twice already. And he'll cry and scream until he's gagging. And he'll wake Hudson up at nap time. UGH.

I just don't know what to do with him. HELP!


  1. Take a deep breath! You are a great mother! Time and age will clear those ears!

  2. I don't know that I can offer any advise, but I will tell you that my daughter went through a 'stage' at 3 1/2. Before that she was an angel...honestly never, or very rarely, got in trouble. And then when she turned 3 1/2 it was like she had to test us all of a sudden. She started whinning and not listening and waking up numerous times at night. I think part of the waking up might have to do with 'night terrors', but I don't know about the rest of it. The good news is that once she turned 4, things were much better. Hang in there, I promise it gets better!

  3. Oh, Nicole, I seriously could substitute Lucy's name in for Porter's and it would be my life!! I wish I had advice, but I will be checking back to see if anyone else gives you advice. I hope she grows out of this, but I don't see it coming anytime soon! I have been doing the time out thing because thinks it is fun to be in her room. Not sure if it is working, but I'm trying to be "consistent."

  4. I feel ya girl! My kids were ANGELS until about 3 years old...then it got better around 4 and now my 6 year old is acting like Porter...yeah my 6 YEAR OLD! Of course, this is partly because there is a new baby...but she had a hard time listening before, lol! I dont have much advise other then its a stage they go through and it WILL get better...when they really understand consequences, it will get better...Porter is just testing the water, if you will, and I am sure he will grow out of it. Hang in there!

  5. coming out of lurkdom to say...oh my...I hear ya and I wish I had answers because my five year old girl has been in this stage ever since we got her at 2.5 (she's adopted). I have felt so guilty for getting so frustrated and thought maybe it was because I wasn't her biological mom, but it is so nice to hear what I feel coming out of someone else's mouth about their biological child. I am totally empathizing with you here. if you figure out any good tricks, please share cuz i'm at the end of my rope, too! =)

  6. omg nicole... I'm so glad you posted this because we are at the exact same point with Tiegan. I was beginning to wonder if I was a crappy Mom! At least now I know T's not the only one.
    T can tell me exactly how many times I had to repeat myself when I tell/ask her to do something... so if she heard me the first 7564543 times, why didn't she just do it?! I know what you're feeling. And honestly I'm as clueless as you are! If it weren't for the baby (and our need for sleep @ night) we would just let her scream in her room until she's over it. But we can't. good luck to everyone with 3.5 year olds!

  7. I can soooo relate to this. Okis never seems to listen to us and it is so aggravating. After reading reviews on Amazon, I just bought the Supernanny book, How to Get the Best from Your Children. One of the focal points of it is talking to your kids so they will listen. I'll let you know how it goes when I finally get to reading it..