We're trying to get out of the house for a playdate at LeeAnn's and Porter starts crying about Nina. He had been cleaning his room and straightened his pictures up (he has a picture of him and Nina framed, and a picture of him and my mom framed). I'm amazed at the raw emotion he still feels... and I guess I don't realize how it still, nearly 2 years later, affects him.
We talked and cried about Nina and that it's okay to cry, it's okay to talk about her and that we can cry and think about her because we all loved her. He asked when she was coming back.... and of course the answer brought on more tears. I tried to explain that when we get old we will die and go to Heaven and be with Nina and Jesus. Porter asked how God will get our bodies up there. I said I didn't know. He said he thinks God will fly a rocket down here to take us up to Heaven. Now that would be interesting!
And of course, all the missing Nina talk brought up my mom and how he misses her. I think a phone call is in order this morning.
I'm glad he is able to talk to me about this a little, and somewhat verbalize his feelings about missing Nina and my mom. Its hard to see him hurting. I think that hurts me the most.... seeing him hurt.